my boyfrined has depression and i cant help

missnothing · October 21st, 2010, 07:07 AM

basically every time i try to "cheer him up" i just make things worse.
i end up fustrated and he gets even more deprssed and upset.
At times i feel like breaking up with him but i know that will only make things worse and tbh i dont want to because i love him and i do want to help but dont know how
can anyone give me some advise...

vitae · March 24th, 2011, 08:09 AM

It can be extremely difficult for you if the person you're in a relationship with it struggling with depression. First and foremost you need to tell yourself that the way he feels is not reflective of you. It is not your responsibly to make him happy.

Now as for what you can do...you can be supportive and loving but remember to not put the expectation on yourself to make him change. You can be loving, share your time, listen (which is really more important than what you say), reflect what you're hearing from him, and encourage him to seek help.

Staying with someone who's going through depression is very challenging. While it's wonderful to be supportive of them you need to make sure you take care of yourself. Go out and have fun with your friends without him, do activities you enjoy alone, and set some limits about how much he can use you for support. All this can be a bit difficult at times but it's better for him and yourself.

Depression.Study · April 17th, 2011, 11:27 PM

I am curious if your boyfriend has been professionally diagnosed with depression for the first time during the past six months? Romantic couples are needed for a study about depression within relationships.

Each partner will earn a $15 Target or Walmart Card (your choice) by completing a 30 to 45 minute online questionnaire.

To sign up, send an email to romantic.relationship.research@gmail.com with (1) your name, (2) your email address, (3) your partner’s name, (4) your partner’s email address, and (5) the date of first-time professional depression diagnosis.

Questions? Email Dr. Leanne Knobloch, University of Illinois (knobl@illinois.edu).

Thanks!

Godwin · December 7th, 2011, 04:14 AM

Hi,
Some tips for both of you to beat depression effectively.
Do take deep breath in fresh air,
Do start some light exercise,
Eat a well balanced diet,
Share your problems with your family members,
Increase water intake,
Avoid alcohol, caffeine and other stimulants,
If you do not eat well take adequate amount of multivitamin.

October 21st, 2010, 07:07 AM	#1
missnothing Junior Member Join Date: Oct 2010 Posts: 1	my boyfrined has depression and i cant help basically every time i try to "cheer him up" i just make things worse. i end up fustrated and he gets even more deprssed and upset. At times i feel like breaking up with him but i know that will only make things worse and tbh i dont want to because i love him and i do want to help but dont know how can anyone give me some advise...

March 24th, 2011, 08:09 AM	#2
vitae Vitae Join Date: Mar 2011 Posts: 1	Patience It can be extremely difficult for you if the person you're in a relationship with it struggling with depression. First and foremost you need to tell yourself that the way he feels is not reflective of you. It is not your responsibly to make him happy. Now as for what you can do...you can be supportive and loving but remember to not put the expectation on yourself to make him change. You can be loving, share your time, listen (which is really more important than what you say), reflect what you're hearing from him, and encourage him to seek help. Staying with someone who's going through depression is very challenging. While it's wonderful to be supportive of them you need to make sure you take care of yourself. Go out and have fun with your friends without him, do activities you enjoy alone, and set some limits about how much he can use you for support. All this can be a bit difficult at times but it's better for him and yourself.

December 7th, 2011, 04:14 AM	#4
Godwin Junior Member Join Date: Nov 2011 Posts: 16	Hi, Some tips for both of you to beat depression effectively. Do take deep breath in fresh air, Do start some light exercise, Eat a well balanced diet, Share your problems with your family members, Increase water intake, Avoid alcohol, caffeine and other stimulants, If you do not eat well take adequate amount of multivitamin. __________________ Godwin

April 17th, 2011, 11:27 PM	#3
Depression.Study Junior Member Join Date: Apr 2011 Posts: 3	I am curious if your boyfriend has been professionally diagnosed with depression for the first time during the past six months? Romantic couples are needed for a study about depression within relationships. Each partner will earn a $15 Target or Walmart Card (your choice) by completing a 30 to 45 minute online questionnaire. To sign up, send an email to romantic.relationship.research@gmail.com with (1) your name, (2) your email address, (3) your partner’s name, (4) your partner’s email address, and (5) the date of first-time professional depression diagnosis. Questions? Email Dr. Leanne Knobloch, University of Illinois (knobl@illinois.edu). Thanks!