I Lost my true love

Lostlove · May 19th, 2010, 02:46 PM

I moved out to California from the midwest with the love of my life. I have been with her for 9 years since we were both 14. We have had good and bad times just like everyone but obviously more good then bad since we were always together and since she was able to give up everything and move with me. The economy sucks and she couldn't get a job for the 9 months she was out here with me. That led to more stress and more stupid arguements about things that were so small in my mind. I never saw it coming but 2 months ago, after being here for 9 months... she told me she was leaving me and going back home. She was very upset and angry at me saying that she jsut wasn't happy here and did not like the person she was becoming. She started off mad and agry... left in 3 days after hitting me with this sledgehammer of a comment. I never saw it coming! Then by the time she left she was saying things like I love you and I want to make us work but I need time away. The longer and longer she is home the less confidence she has and she can't say I love you or I want to be with you. Only mixted signals.. she will call then hang up, then tell me she just doesn't know about us, and then play games with my head by teasing me with the potential of a movie date afar or teasting me with sexy pictures but then never follows up on them, and then doesn't respond to my texts, doesn't respond to my emails, doesn't say anything about flowers I send her.... She is driving me crazy. I don't know how to live without her. I can get through the day but it hurts so much. I was going to ask her to marry me right before she hit me with this. Now I am in a scary place, no friends, no family, no nothing. I don't know where I am going and all I can do is hold onto hope that she is trying to figure things out... but it does not seem like she is. It seems like she is just having a great time back home with friends every day as I sit in my sorrow and hatred of my own life. I lost a part of me and I don't know how to feel whole or happy again. This is not a puppy love. This is the person I know with all certainty I am best with. I don't need her. I want her... because she makes me more happy than anyone else in the world and she makes me a better man.

I just don't know how much longer I can hold on to ups and downs and ups and downs and I don't know at all what she is thinking and I don't want to, and feel like sometimes I can't do this anymore. If this is life then sometimes I just don't want to live it anymore and that.. honestly... scares me.

What do I do?
What is she doing?
How do I find happiness?
How do I do whatever I can to help her find happiness and then see it was with me?

She told me that she has never said that it is completely over... but this draggin game is soo hard. I just am afraid that she is letting me go slowly. I don't know anything really. All I know is that sometimes she shows love to me and sometimes it is pure anger. Then it is ignoring me. Then it is calling me and hanging up as I answer the phone.

WHAT DO I DO TO STOP FEELING THIS WAY!!!
I can't sleep, I can't eat, I am losing my hair, I can't work at work, and I have no one to talk to or even distract me....

I hate my life

botusli1 · May 26th, 2010, 09:51 PM

i think time heals everything...just let some time pass and it will fell better..

Loomy · November 10th, 2011, 04:07 AM

Hay to all
Here is deeply shock for every one to lost their real love,once I committed in this bad time in my youthfully,when I lost my true love.No one can console this tragedy with the person who suffer in.It is the time only to heel the person.

Crooks.Aiden · March 8th, 2012, 06:31 AM

I do agree with you time heals every thing and it is the only solution for this now.So be patient and keep your self busy in your work.

Crooks.Aiden · March 10th, 2012, 01:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Crooks.Aiden

I do agree with you time heals every thing and it is the only solution for this now.So be patient and keep your self busy in your work.

Personal Trainer Memphis

May 19th, 2010, 02:46 PM	#1
Lostlove Junior Member Join Date: May 2010 Posts: 1	I Lost my true love I moved out to California from the midwest with the love of my life. I have been with her for 9 years since we were both 14. We have had good and bad times just like everyone but obviously more good then bad since we were always together and since she was able to give up everything and move with me. The economy sucks and she couldn't get a job for the 9 months she was out here with me. That led to more stress and more stupid arguements about things that were so small in my mind. I never saw it coming but 2 months ago, after being here for 9 months... she told me she was leaving me and going back home. She was very upset and angry at me saying that she jsut wasn't happy here and did not like the person she was becoming. She started off mad and agry... left in 3 days after hitting me with this sledgehammer of a comment. I never saw it coming! Then by the time she left she was saying things like I love you and I want to make us work but I need time away. The longer and longer she is home the less confidence she has and she can't say I love you or I want to be with you. Only mixted signals.. she will call then hang up, then tell me she just doesn't know about us, and then play games with my head by teasing me with the potential of a movie date afar or teasting me with sexy pictures but then never follows up on them, and then doesn't respond to my texts, doesn't respond to my emails, doesn't say anything about flowers I send her.... She is driving me crazy. I don't know how to live without her. I can get through the day but it hurts so much. I was going to ask her to marry me right before she hit me with this. Now I am in a scary place, no friends, no family, no nothing. I don't know where I am going and all I can do is hold onto hope that she is trying to figure things out... but it does not seem like she is. It seems like she is just having a great time back home with friends every day as I sit in my sorrow and hatred of my own life. I lost a part of me and I don't know how to feel whole or happy again. This is not a puppy love. This is the person I know with all certainty I am best with. I don't need her. I want her... because she makes me more happy than anyone else in the world and she makes me a better man. I just don't know how much longer I can hold on to ups and downs and ups and downs and I don't know at all what she is thinking and I don't want to, and feel like sometimes I can't do this anymore. If this is life then sometimes I just don't want to live it anymore and that.. honestly... scares me. What do I do? What is she doing? How do I find happiness? How do I do whatever I can to help her find happiness and then see it was with me? She told me that she has never said that it is completely over... but this draggin game is soo hard. I just am afraid that she is letting me go slowly. I don't know anything really. All I know is that sometimes she shows love to me and sometimes it is pure anger. Then it is ignoring me. Then it is calling me and hanging up as I answer the phone. WHAT DO I DO TO STOP FEELING THIS WAY!!! I can't sleep, I can't eat, I am losing my hair, I can't work at work, and I have no one to talk to or even distract me.... I hate my life

November 10th, 2011, 04:07 AM	#3
Loomy Junior Member Join Date: Nov 2011 Posts: 13	Hay to all Here is deeply shock for every one to lost their real love,once I committed in this bad time in my youthfully,when I lost my true love.No one can console this tragedy with the person who suffer in.It is the time only to heel the person. __________________ Loomy

May 26th, 2010, 09:51 PM	#2
botusli1 Junior Member Join Date: May 2010 Location: ny Posts: 16	i think time heals everything...just let some time pass and it will fell better..

March 8th, 2012, 06:31 AM	#4
Crooks.Aiden Junior Member Join Date: Mar 2012 Posts: 22	I do agree with you time heals every thing and it is the only solution for this now.So be patient and keep your self busy in your work.