I am so sorry to hear of your loss my dear,and you are not alone I used to think about my loss too for many yrs and i wasted alot of years of my life, because of flash back's of the loss and how i lost my son,i was 17 years young back then and had a husband that sounded just like yours.and had to have a hysterectomy when i was 18 yrs old,i was very angery,i was the one whom wanted 12 kids.and never got to raise any at all unless someone dropped one off because they were to busy drinking to give a poop about them,some times women i knew would drop there kids off for days so they could go get drunk.but didnt tell me until they would call later in the night (no concern if I may have had to go to an appointment somewhere)so is to let me know they were going to a party and would i mind keeping them overnight.no change of cloths no extra dippers no extra food.thank God for food banks.that was a very long time ago.but when they came back to get them then i was left with a deep depression of abandoment issues,and more loss. sence then in 1988 i got into a 12 step group and counsling groups.ive worked on a voluter hot line for suicide prevention, I sponsor many women in our groups.have watched many move on in there life.so if you ever want to talk email me. ok you hang in there honey, and merry christmas to you all,ps i just started to medically retire from my job.so i have plenty of time for now.as ever Roxanne SlowRoxy1988
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