introduction
 

My name is Lauren, I'm 20 years old, and I bottle up my emotions. It's a mixture between not being able to fully trust people and feeling like my problems are going to be a burden to my friends. I have been having a difficult time lately, and I am not sure where to start. I want to be happier, and I am hoping this will help. I am an artist, a hopeless romantic, and I like to use humor as a defense mechanism, although often what I think is funny and others think is funny are two completely different things. I have ADD and depression according to my psychiatrist, but I don't take my depression medication and i'm pretty sure I don't actually need my ADD medication. I have a condition called Hashimoto's Thyroiditis which is an autoimmune disease that causes your body to mistake your thyroid gland for foreign tissue and eventually breaks down your thyroid so that it stops producing hormones that regulate metabolism. I think that my depression and "ADD" are caused by this condition because I have several other symptoms associated with this, all of which I am treated separately for. I went to an endocrinologist and they didn't ask me about my symptoms, they just tested the hormone levels in my blood and told me that they were not low enough yet for me to go on medication. I think another reason they didn't put me on the meds is because i am at a normal weight, when most people with this condition begin to gain weight whether they eat right and exercise or not. I am convinced that if they could put me on hypothyroid meds i wouldn't have to take the ADD meds, the depression meds, I wouldn't have to have several types of medicated lotion for my severely dry skin, I wouldn't have such dry hair and brittle nails, I wouldn't be so tired all the time, and just in general my life would be easier. I hope that I can use this site to deal with my everyday problems on my own since i can't get the medication that I believe will help me.